Carlos Cavallo from the datingadviceguru.com, specializes in dating advice for women. As with anything else of value in life, it takes some work to have a good relationship. Sometimes a little bit of help or professional advice can help leads us away from disaster. This hold especially true in the world of dating and relationships. Read below to grasp some valuable dating insight from Carlos that just may build your confidence for a first date.
No matter how great the guy is that you’re dating, you don’t have to be absolutely everything he wants. If he’s part of a bowling group, and you think the sport is silly, then don’t take it up just to please him and be around him. Make sure that you maintain your own interests and hobbies; if he wants to participate, that’s fine; if not, that’s also fine. You don’t want to be needy!
Having said that, make it clear that you’re able to make time for your partner. If you sense it’s important for him for you to go to a dinner where he’s getting an award, for example, then make sure you go even if you know you are going to be bored stiff.
It’s not all about meeting men
You’re probably not going to meet many men if you don’t leave your apartment, so, by all means, get out. That doesn’t mean, however, that you should be going out JUST to meet guys. For example, doing some volunteer work one night a week at the local library is a good idea because you might meet a potential romantic partner, and it’s also a good idea if you just meet people you aren’t interested in dating. You win either way!
Be someone you would want to date
When you love and respect yourself, other people, including men, will take you more seriously. If you put yourself down, then you’re basically sending other people the message that it’s okay for them to do so as well.
If you’re feeling some sparks with a guy, then let him be the one that chases you. If he’s interested, then he will, and if he isn’t, then he won’t. If you’re always the one initiating contact, then it could be that you were imagining those sparks to begin with.
You can always bail out
While relationships take work to succeed, never be afraid to leave one if your partner crosses the line with you. The most obvious example of this is physical or mental abuse; when this happens the first time, then walk. It’s that simple.
Furthermore, being single is not the end of the world. You can have a wonderful and fulfilling life without a romantic partner just as you can have one with a romantic partner. Therefore, don’t settle. Unless you’re connecting mentally, emotionally and physically with your partner, it’s probably best for you to go it alone. In fact, getting out of a doomed relationship will likely be a big relief.
Inevitably, you’re going to disagree about something with your partner. When this happens, you need to speak your mind. You don’t have to do this in an aggressive way, but you do need to make it clear what you want or don’t want. He’s not a mind reader!
When big obstacles arrive – one person wants children, the other doesn’t, for example – you’ve got to talk them out rather than avoid them. If you put them off too long, they’re going to fester, and neither one of you is going to be happy. Make sure that he’s treating you right and showing you respect, and also remember that you have to treat him that way yourself.